Did we once... have a joke thread? General Chat

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by Malka, Jul 27, 2016.

  1. Malka

    Malka Member

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  3. BronsonTheBulldog

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    If i won the lottery, i'd open a pizza express right next to a vision express, just to see how many of their customers we got!
  4. BronsonTheBulldog

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    Apparently 70% of criminals always return to the scene of their crime. Which explains why we got so many Australians living here!
  5. Malka

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  6. Malka

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  7. who owns who

    who owns who Member

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    Seems like a take off of “who’s on first”.
    I personally like Cheech and Chong’s “Daves not here”.
  8. Malka

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    CaroleC likes this.

    [​IMG]
  9. Malka

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  11. BronsonTheBulldog

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    Malka and CaroleC like this.
    My mate just asked me if I knew the time of the train from London to Bristol, so I said why don't you check online. He said isn't that a bit dangerous!
  12. BronsonTheBulldog

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    Malka likes this.
    I just went into my local shop and asked the shopkeeper 'Do you do Twix?' and he said 'No, but I'm quite good at juggling!'
  13. Malka

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  14. Malka

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  15. Malka

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  16. Malka

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  17. Malka

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  18. Malka

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    In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also call Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.

    The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin. Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one.

    Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of 'cocktails', 'highballs' and just a good old-fashioned 'stiff drink'. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO. Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
  19. Malka

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  20. Malka

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  21. Malka

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    [​IMG]
    Just put that bottle down now...

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