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Did we once... have a joke thread? General Chat

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by Malka, Jul 27, 2016.

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  1. Malka

    Malka Member

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    #361 Apr 22, 2019

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  2. BronsonTheBulldog

    BronsonTheBulldog Member

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    #362 Apr 24, 2019
    If i won the lottery, i'd open a pizza express right next to a vision express, just to see how many of their customers we got!
  3. BronsonTheBulldog

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    #363 Apr 25, 2019
    Apparently 70% of criminals always return to the scene of their crime. Which explains why we got so many Australians living here!
  4. Malka

    Malka Member

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    #364 Apr 25, 2019
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  5. Malka

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    #365 Apr 28, 2019

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  6. who owns who

    who owns who Member

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    #366 Apr 28, 2019
    Seems like a take off of “who’s on first”.
    I personally like Cheech and Chong’s “Daves not here”.
  7. Malka

    Malka Member

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    #367 Apr 30, 2019
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  8. Malka

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    #368 May 19, 2019

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  9. Malka

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    #369 May 27, 2019
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  10. BronsonTheBulldog

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    #370 May 28, 2019
    Malka and CaroleC like this.
    My mate just asked me if I knew the time of the train from London to Bristol, so I said why don't you check online. He said isn't that a bit dangerous!
  11. BronsonTheBulldog

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    #371 May 30, 2019
    Malka likes this.
    I just went into my local shop and asked the shopkeeper 'Do you do Twix?' and he said 'No, but I'm quite good at juggling!'
  12. Malka

    Malka Member

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    #372 May 30, 2019
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  13. Malka

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    #373 Jun 16, 2019
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  14. Malka

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    #374 Jun 20, 2019
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  15. Malka

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    #375 Jun 23, 2019
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  16. Malka

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    #376 Jun 30, 2019
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  17. Malka

    Malka Member

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    #377 Jul 2, 2019
    In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also call Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.

    The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and of course, Ibepokin. Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one.

    Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of 'cocktails', 'highballs' and just a good old-fashioned 'stiff drink'. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO. Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
  18. Malka

    Malka Member

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    #378 Jul 7, 2019
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  19. Malka

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    #379 Jul 21, 2019

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  20. Malka

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    #380 Aug 7, 2019
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    Just put that bottle down now...
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